THeDEAdP0ETsS0CIETy

The day I was born was almost the day I died. With the umbilical cord wrapped around my neck I struggled for breath, Almost suffocating under the trauma of being born. Until my state funded, NHS midwife cut the cord just in time and brought me into this world. Handing me over to my mother, Whose trauma had exceeded my own. They said I was lucky to be alive but luck was not a factor. At the age of two I took my first steps and spoke my first words In and NHS hospital. This was due to a circulatory disorder called Reynaud’s, which causes me to lose circulation in my extremities. And for the second time in as many years my life was sav

Dear ‘Yesterdays Girl’ When you asked if we could ‘help’ you, It sounded as though you thought you were asking the impossible… …or for directions to the nearest supermarket. Instead, You told me he ‘abused’ you, But you didn’t use those ‘words’ You told me he ‘touched’ you, Even after you said ‘no’, You told me he ‘hurt’ you when he was ‘bored’ And even worse, he made you watch it like it was a trip to the cinema You told me he was ‘all you had in the world’ Like you were lucky to have a man who used his fist ins

GOD’S WAITING ROOM At 16 I wait for God’s waiting room to call out my name, And I wonder when it is my turn to have my deepest prayers answered. They say, “Hello Miss, just to let you know, your appointment has now been delayed by approximately 30 minutes due to low resources. We apologise for any inconvenience caused but please take advantage of our magazines and our water machine whilst you wait”. And I say, “That’s ok, I’ll just wait here, let me know if anything changes”. I wait until I am eventually called, and I explain to God that my mother is sick, That the woman who birthed me, c

To the one who isn't here, Please tell me what you see. Are you looking up? Or are you watching over me? Did you hear me when I said That I forgive you ? And you're mine? Did it even matter? Was there even time? When I cried next to your bedside, Did you feel my hand take yours? Did you hear me sing to you, As the world closed it's doors? Did your heart cry out like mine, When we said our last goodbye? Did you know that we were with you As you journeyed one last time?

Leaves in the brisk dawn cool with a gentle phobia like a wild pheasant bedding down, basking in the autumn brush to wait out a late morning's dew. A damp, muted air heavy with November promise reveals a secret to migrating flocks and holds the attention of a young colt in the distance. A maple soft bridge rests soundly between Summer and her lush-warm lover, Autumn fades into the present. There is a charm to Autumn the way a hidden lake is charming as you drive quietly past it When it opens its gentle mouth to yawn in a burst of color you can see old comfortable spaces there between the teeth It smells like homemade cornbread and there is

I wanted to crawl out of that old light in my cat's eye I could see you; too vibrant for me my fingers bled and I drank from them There was a sharp curve to the moon that didn't hurt and the stars were small metal particles that remained, the only evidence the night allowed of that change in spirit Holy union of nightmares call out to the unseen the outside smells like wet dirt, an old walkway that has become caked to the bottom of my shoe. My third eye eclipses at the oddest time

Splinter at the soft marrow; She, She ache Nails that grow towards the sky she races to a rhythm. Oh, her blood is on you it fills old desert rivers From mouse to Pharaoh! I want to bite into her golden light hair is breaking, limbs are sobbing You are only surprised by Your lack of strength... shedding her secrets She is.

Sitting, silent, stupid, sulking waiting for it all Wanting pancakes the size of the moon, regretting the look of the moon when the plate is in front of me and the moon has been cut in half One for each of us I cry and cry out to the stars to drag me back to my dreams encase me in their amniotic womb that fits me so well soak me in motherhood age, and wear me out until I too am forced to be born again I don't like to do that all at once I like things to crumble and peak in rhythm, things never quite getting out of hand I love the feeling of the moonlight on my fingers as I make a mess of the nighttime the only one given to me tonight preci

Melting candle in a quiet corner hairy and disobedient drool seeps through your yellow teeth and onto your old coat. Stained glass shadows fall across your brutish form Swollen with grass, eyes dimming from a life of tunnel vision and frenzied survival.

Bleak though we are cracking into brown rabbits like that, teeth gnashing in holy matrimony Burn on feeble eggs! Renewal of our faith in greatness, the rock that budged for Christ Show me your advertisements and I will show you my heart my water-colored organs quick with slavering love Collect, my family, collect Pull the tide in with song; lift up the sacred sound and rejoice Rejoice!